Alternative Reality Test


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Directions:

Before you are a series of two lists: labeled (A) and (B).

Please choose the list in each section that you most relate to in everyday life – and put a star by it.

If at the end of this test you have any stars in the (A) column, you are likely so out of touch with reality that you should report immediately for de-programming.

Please start now:

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(A) Privacy.

(B) CCTV, On camera, Recorded, Taped, Data-based, Warrantlessly wiretapped, Illegally searched and seized, Identity theft, Internet records, Cookies, Reference numbers, Records, Profiles, Documentation, Verification, Mothers maiden name, Social Security Number, Case number, Jury duty, Civic duty, Cashless society, National ID, National Medical Registry, GPS, On Star, The U.S. Census, Employment History, Medical history, Criminal background, Background check, Two forms of I.D, Automatic withdrawal, Tax, Duty tax, Interest, Federal government, Federal income tax, IRS, FBI, CIA, Police records, Fusion centers, Unlawful entry, Junk mail, Spam, Mailing lists, Phone lists, Cold calls, Sales calls, Prank calls, Advertisements, Commercials, Sobriety checks, Police checkpoints, Police brutality, Gun confiscations, Gun bans, And in general too much government intervention into individual state and personal God-given Constitutional rights.

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(A) Call the police.

(B) Dial 9-1-1, Hold while I transfer you, Wait for the police, Get no help, Complain about the police, Get harassed by the police, Stop calling the police, Learn self defense, Buy a gun, and then learn to help yourself.

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(A) Police, Protect and serve.

(B) Police state, Police brutality, Police beatings, Police theft, Embezzlement, Illegal checkpoints, Loss of Posse Comitatus Act (military now can be used as law enforcement), Loss of right to speak to police only through an attorney (deletes the 5th and 6th Amendments), Tazered, Tazered to death, “Don’t Tazer me bro!”, North-Com, Soldiers on the streets, Foreign soldiers in America, Militia vilification, Please hold for the next available officer, The largest street-gang in America, “Not required to protect a citizen…”, Mace, Pepper spray, Batons, Night sticks, Guns, Machine guns, Microwave weapons, Negative energy weapons, SWAT, DEA, ATF, Anti-terrorism units, Local police, City Police, County police, State police, District police, Private Police, Traffic police, Parking police, Doughnut police, Marshalls, Bounty hunters, Homeland Security, Private Security, Airport security, The National Guard, and let’s not forget “Peace-keeping” forces.

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(A) Right to bear arms.

(B) Gun bans, Gun confiscations, Gun registry, Bullet confiscations, Bullet registry, NRA, Search and seizures, Loss of 2nd Amendment rights, Bowling for Columbine, and David Koresh at Waco.

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(A) Terrorism, Terrorists.

(B) Patriot, Veteran, Gun owner, 2nd Amendment supporter, 3rd Party Candidate, Ron Paul supporter, 9-11 Truther, Alternative news outlets, Civil disobedience, Activists, Protestors, Constitutional supporters, Quoting the Constitution, Carrying the Constitution on your person, Taking pictures, Video camera operators, Public speakers, Peaceful gatherings, Peaceful protest, Holding a sign, Posting a ‘negative’ flyer, Hate speech, Thought crime, Political and government criticism, and flying a flag upside down to traditionally signify we’re all in a whole lot of trouble.

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(A) 9/11 “Truth”.

(B) Crazy commie conspiracy theory loving racist white-supremacist anti-Semitic hate speech spewing country-hating flag burning terrorists!

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(A) Diplomacy and Peace.

(B) Tariffs, Sanctions, Restrictions, Veto’s, Directives, Murder, Torture, Government terrorism, False-Flag terrorism, Economic upheaval, Oil and mineral depletion, Destruction of infrastructure, Bombing, Invasion, Occupation, War, Rendition, Genocide, Propaganda, Lies, Fox News, Authorized force, 9-11, 7-7, Economic hit-men, Assassination, Staged coo’s, Managed revolutions, Fixed elections, Voting fraud, Patriot Acts 1-3, Ignoring the Geneva Convention, Permanent state of emergency, Secrecy, Subversive activity, Agent provocateurs, Conspiracies, Military expansion, Debt for land pacts, Land grabs, No-bid contracts, Weapons sales, Nation building, Security grids, United Nations expansion, Zionist expansion, Holocaust lies, And a history that’s always written by the victors.

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(A) Sovereignty, United States.

(B) United Nations (UN), North American Union (NAU), European Union (EU), North American Free Trade Agreement (NAFTA), Central American Free Trade Agreement (CAFTA), Organization of American States (OAS), Free Trade Area of the Americas (FTAA), World government, World Economic Forum, World Trade Organization (WTO), World Bank Group, International Monetary Fund (IMF), North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO), World Health Organization (WHO), World Food Program (WFP), United Nations Educational Scientific and Cultural Organization (UNESCO), International Maritime Organization (IMO), United Nations Research Institute on Social Development (UNRISD), International Atomic Energy Agency (IAEA), United Nations Office for Drug Control and Crime Prevention (UNODCCP), United Nations Crime and Justice Information Network (UNCJIN), International Labor Organization (ILO), Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD), International Centre for the Prevention of Crime (ICPC), World Directory of Criminological Resources (WDCR), Council on Foreign Relations (CFR), Tri-Lateral Commission, Bilderberg Group, Carlyle Group, The New World Order, Open Borders Policy, Globalization, International affairs, Universal Health Care, Protocols of Zion, Iron Mountain, Nationalism, The ever expanding Federal government, And the Smart Grid.

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(A) Diversity, Pride, Respect, Equality, Equal Rights, and Self-determination.

(B) Racial profiling, Quota laws, Equal Opportunity, The Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now (ACORN), La Raza, National Council of La Raza, The Washington Office on Latin America (WOLA), National Immigration Law Center, United Negro College Fund, The National Association for the Advancement of Colored People (NAACP), Congressional Black Caucus Foundation Inc, American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU), Poverty and Race Research Action Council, American Jewish Committee, Anti-Defamation League (ADL), Jewish Council for Public Affairs, National Council of Jewish Women, United Jewish Communities, American Association of People with Disabilities, National Disability Rights Network, Consortium for Citizens with Disabilities Catholic Charities USA, National Council of the Churches of Christ in the USA, NETWORK – A National Catholic Social Justice Lobby, Religious Action Center, Center for Community Change, Center for Women Policy Studies, Institute for Women’s Policy Research, National Women’s Law Center, Women of Vision and Action, National Partnership for Women and Families, Child Welfare League of America, Community Action Partnership, and on and on and on. But as for rights groups for the increasingly threatened and undermined average working-class white male in America… Sorry but the only thing I could find was the Klux Klux Klan, and a bunch of comments about the white devil. ☹

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(A) New, Well Built, Durable.

(B) Used, Recycled, Second-hand, Vintage, Natural, Green, Day old, On sale, Plastic, Cheap, Economical, Disposable, Non-reusable, Affordable, Inexpensive, Refurbished, Restored, Mocked, Smartened up, Renovated, Painted, Redecorated, Renewed, Revamped, Fixed up, Overhauled, and Reassembled.

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(A) Quality.

(B) Quantity.

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(A) Hand made.

(B) Mass produced and Manufactured in foreign factory sweat-shops.

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(A) Value, Made in America.

(B) Implied value, Made in China, Outsourced, Re-distributed, Imported, Sweat shops, Indentured servitude, Slave labor, Prison labor, Mass-produced, Futures, Derivatives, Bubbles, Monetary devaluation, Quantitative easing, Fractional Reserve System, Fiat currency, Public Debt, Toxic Assets, Interest rate fluctuation, Inflation and Deflation, Hyper-inflation, Hyper-deflation, Monopolies, Cartels, Free market, Free trade, Stock options, Financial crisis, Real estate crisis, Commercial real estate crisis, Economic crisis, Banking crisis, Derivatives crisis, Subprime mortgage crisis, Budgets, Comprehensive Annual Reports (CAFR), American Bankers Association (ABA), Emergency Economic Stabilization Act of 2008, Troubled Asset Relief Program (TARP), Cash for Clunkers, Banker bail-outs, Resident alien President Barry Satoro (Barrack Husain Obama) and, for what it’s worth… Hope and Change!

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(A) Conserve, Reuse.

(B) Disposable, Recyclable, Plastic, Throw away, or as the newest sect of the most holy brainwashed likes to call it… Green.

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(A) God Given Rights.

(B) Federally Mandated Privileges.

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(A) Free Speech.

(B) Free-speech zones.

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(A) Freedom, Able to do.

(B) Allowed to do temporarily but only at certain times on certain days between the hours of… but not on holidays, and you’ll need a permit but remember no food or drink, pets, kids, glass, bikes, fire, guns, nudity, fun, laughter, loud noise, or anything non-green allowed, and only in the perimeter of a certain area, but not in the red or blue zone unless otherwise posted, and then not without special permission and a state or county license for special day use, but, definitely not overnight. Oh, and please recycle. ☺

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(A) Freedom, Life, liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness.

(B) Debt, Taxes, Interest, Tariffs, Tolls, Fines, Levies, Fees, Dues, Duties, Orders, Finance charges, Excises, Audits, Permits, Licenses, Contracts, Wills, Laws, Illegalities, Commandments, Articles, Rules, Regulations, Restrictions, Requirements, Requisites, Prerequisites, Post-Requisites, Documentation, Obligations, Restraints, Constraints, Options, Margins, Perimeters, Conditions, Clauses, Tenure, Status, Etiquette, Protocol, Propriety, Political Correctness, Posted limits, Speed limits, Size limits, Weight limits, CCTV, Red-light cameras, Citations, Tickets, Quotas, Discrimination, “Equal Opportunity”, Signs, Signals, Boundaries, Borders, Fences, Zones, Zoning, Associations, Secret societies, Memberships, Exclusions, Excommunications, Directives, Mandates, Sanctions, Liability, Requisition, Confiscation, Eminent Domain, Restraint, Restraining orders, Position, Possession, Influence, Ownership, Control, Lawsuits, Punishment, Capital punishment, Jail, Detention, Psychiatric observation followed by a Psychiatric evaluation, Rendition, Custody, Confinement, Captivity, Incarceration, Imprisonment, Arrest, Manhunts, Warrants, Americas Most Wanted, One- child policies, Eugenics, Mandatory abortion, Mandatory sterilization, Fluoridated water supply, Forced inoculation, Genocide, Ethnic cleansing, Required insurance, Prescriptions, Referrals, Waiting Lists, Denial of care, Socialism, Fascism, Corporatism, Nationalism, Liberalism, Free speech zones, Terrorist watch lists, No-fly lists, and Classified information.

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(A) Identity, Individualism, Self-Awareness, We the people.

(B) Identity theft, Name, Social Security number, Height, Weight, Gender, Eye-color, Hair-color, Facebook, Myspace, Your channel, Your profile, Your stats, Your handle, Your avatar, Your photos, Your pics, Projected self-image, Character, M.O, RFID microchip, REAL ID Act, National ID card, Barcodes, Implantable identification microchip, Facial recognition software, Biometrics, Eye scans, Retinal scans, Thumbprints, Forced DNA testing, Genetics, Cloning, Gene splicing, Eugenics, Trans-humanism, Mailing lists, Email lists, Phone lists, Contact lists, Unauthorized Biographies, Opinions, Beliefs, Orthodoxy, Faith, Brain-washing, Re-education, Conformity, Acceptance, Popularity, Tradition, Convention, Obeying the rules, Playing the Game, Running the rat race, Your personal self-worth, Stature, Statistics, Numbers, Personal files, Personal history, Personal records, Disassociation, Lack of Empathy, Breast implants, Collagen, Botulism, Make-up, Make-over, Tattoos, Piercing, Plastic surgery, Facial reconstruction, Liposuction, Tummy tucks, Nose jobs,  Augmentation, Reduction, Look-a-likes, Metro-sexuals, Herd mentality, Group-think, Sheep, Plebs, Pleebs, Commoners, Middle class, Useless eaters, Cannon fodder, Pawns, and “Uniquely American!”

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(A) Romance, Love, Marriage.

(B) Dating shows, Dating lines, Dating personals, Dating referrals, Dating websites, Dating services, Online dating, Speed dating, E-Harmony, Cruising, Phone sex, Bathroom sex, Web-cams, Hookups, Porn, Child pornography, Bath-houses, Multiple partners, Polygamy, Divorce, Las Vegas, Prostitution, Cheating, Indulgence, Sexually transmitted diseases, Three-ways, Four-ways, Five-ways, Six-ways, and at some point group sex, Orgies, Loss of family values, The Dating Game, The Bachelor, The Bachelorette, The Newlywed Game, Married With Children, Cheaters, Strip tease, Strip shows, Sex arcades, Sex shops, Sex books, Sex sites, Sex parties, Madonna and Britney Spears, XXX, S&M, Leather, Pain, Whips and chains, Fantasies, Prison Sex, Rape, Prison rape, Gang rape, Rape rooms, Ritual Sex, Tantric sex, Sex Changes, Gay, Lesbian, Transgender, Transvestites, And let’s not forget the rampant unpunished pedophilia by priests and politicians.

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(A) Reality, Common sense, The real world, and the Truth.

(B) Reality TV, Virtual reality, Alternative reality, Cyber, Computer generated, Second Life, Holographic, 2D, 3D, 4D, online gaming-shopping-dating-chatting-sex-commerce-business and worlds, Pyramid schemes, Perception, Presumption, Imitation, Counterfeit, Falsified, Simulated, Replicated, Lies, Phony, Bogus, Sham, Pretend, The History Channel, National Geographic, News, Fake news, Fox News, Alternative news, Propaganda, Cartoons, Animation, Adult programming, Distraction, Pacing, Leading, Flicker rates, Trance induction, Enhanced suggestibility, Hypnotic suggestion, Ericksonian techniques, Predictive programming, Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP), Non-dominant hemisphere programming, Hidden meanings, Imbedded suggestions, Subliminal messaging, Emotional transfer, Psychological warfare, Pre-programmed response adaptation, Linking statements, Causality Bridges, Subconscious manipulation, Duplicity, Deception, Media, Magazines, Movies, Television, Sitcoms, Dramas, Cop shows, Detective shows, Law and Order times four, Romance novels, Fiction, Science-fiction, Biographies, Autobiographies, Ghost writers, Religions (100’s if not 1000’s of them!), Fashion, Symbolism, Ozone Depletion, Global warming, Global cooling, Global change, Climate change, Bullshit, Space aliens, Flying saucers, Project Bluebeam, The Man on the Moon, And an international organization of terrorists who hates America for its freedom (LOL) – the new-fangled, virtual way of saying ha-ha-ha.

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(A) Trust.

(B) Credit rating, Contractual obligations, Charters, Court appointed attorney, Sign them up, Lease, Agreements, Deeds, Bonds, Bail, Parole, Indentured, Tattle-tail, Lie detectors, Spy, Watch, Cyber-spy, Surveillance, Tail, Wiretap, Foreclosure, Repossession, Seizure, Bankruptcy, Debt, Hold, and Incarceration.

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(A) Pride, Hard working.

(B) Overworked, Under paid, Unionized, Part-time, Temporary, Seasonal, On-call, No benefits, Government worker, Laid off, Let go, Without a job, Jobless, Out of work, Out of a job, Unwaged, Made redundant, Unemployed, On unemployment, Unskilled laborer, Idle, Bum, Homeless, Poor, Unfortunate, Unlucky, A drain on society, On the streets, Food stamps, Food lines, Destitute, Without a roof over your head, Down-and-out, Down on your luck, FRLO’d, Incompetent, Dismissed, Not needed, Not hiring, Not experienced, Too experienced, Work reduction, Fired, and not economically viable.

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(A) A well-regulated Militia.

(B) National Guard, Black-Water, American Police Force, Private security, and an “all-volunteer” army.

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(A) Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts.

(B) Sponsored by Homeland Security and the Obama youth corps.

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(A)
Education.

(B) Job training, Dumbing down, Multiple choice answers, Detention, Suspension, Expulsion, Written up, Warned, Metal detectors, School uniforms, New and improved history books, Book bans, Budget cuts, Gambling, The lottery, The Lotto, Sports budget upsurge, Educational budget down swell, Music and arts program annihilation, After-school programs severed, Home schooling outlawed, Underpaid teachers, Vaccinations required, Ritalin, Prozac, Lithium, Anti-depressants, Anti-Psychotics, Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD), Learning disabilities, Autism, Special education, School shootings, and ROTC.

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(A) After school activities.

(B) Video games, Television, Internet surfing.

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(A) Family dinner by the TV.

(B) TV Dinner.

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(A) Mother, Father, and Parental guidance.

(B) Reeducation, Sexual Education, Health Education, Death Education, Home Economics, Child Protective Services (CPS), Child support, Juvenile Hall, Child care, Day care, Agencies, Big Brothers/Big Sisters, Nanny’s, Mid-wives, Maids, Babysitters, Latch key kids, Pre-school, Finishing school, Boarding school, Military school, Abortion, Adoption, Orphanages, Wards of the state, Supervised visitation, Child custody, Custody battles, Child abuse, Domestic violence, Child slavery, Child prostitution, Child pornography, TV dinners, Xbox, Playstation, Nintendo, Massive Multiplayer Online Worlds, Television, After-school television programming, and the corporation known as Disney.

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(A)
Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter, and Holidays.

(B) Christmas tree, Gifts, Ham, Mistletoe, Lights, Rudolf, Santa Claus, Football, Bingo, Turkey, Easter eggs, Easter baskets, Easter dresses, The Easter Bunny, Days off, 3 day weekends, Parties, Tailgate parties, Keggers, Leprechauns, Rainbows, Festivals, Celebrations, Feasts, Vacation, No work, No school, Spring Break, Christmas break, Easter break, Flags, Fireworks, Sparklers, Red Devil brand, “St. Valentine” who was no saint at all, Cupid, Chocolate, Candy, Roses, Greeting cards, Green beer, Green Cloths, Green rivers, Pinch me, Holiday cartoons, Holiday specials, Holiday shopping, Last minute shopping, Pre-sales, Post-sales, White sales,  Christmas sales, Consumerism, Materialism, Greed, Desire, Gluttony, Self-indulgence, The Rockefeller Center, and the total abandonment of who or what was being celebrated in the first place.

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(A)
Talking, Reading, Writing.

(B) Texting, Typing, Messaging, Instant messaging, Watching, Viewing, Screening, Presentations, Exhibitions, Productions, Playing, Gaming, MMO, Email, Voicemail, Picture mail, Video mail, Voice/speech recognition, Twitter, MySpace, Facebook, Chat, Blog, Web-cam, Vonage, Hyper-text, Ebonics, Press (2) for English, Computer interface, E-books, Books on tape, Book bans, Censorship, Cell phone, I-Phone, Speaker phone, Video phone, Answering machine, and leave me a message.

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(A) Music.

(B) Computerized, Synthesized, Electronic, Electronica, Psychedelic, Underground, Underworld, Modern, Mixed, Re-made, Re-mixed, Rave, Dance, Techno, Rave, Trip-hop, Drum and bass, Acid, Dance hall, Spoken word, Rap, Gangsta Rap, Reggae, Rasta, Soca, Dub, Dubstep, Caribbean, Calypso, Pop, Soul, Neo Soul, Hip-Hop, R&B, Old-School, New-School, Urban, Street, Acoustic, Unplugged, Live, Raw, Blues, Rock, Acid Rock, Punk Rock, Grunge Rock, Glam Rock, Hard Rock, Slow Rock, Classic Rock, Southern Rock, Canadian Rock, Easy Rock, Easy Listening, Folk, Country, Love songs, Religious, Christian, Christmas, Gospel, Chamber, Choir, Chanting, Tribe, House, Deep House, Garage, Lounge, Classical, Traditional, Contemporary, Baroque, Instrumental, World, Funk, Jazz, Smooth jazz, Soft jazz, Acid jazz, Flamenco, Salsa, Samba, Rumba, Bose Nova, Persian, African, Disco, Big band, Swing, Orchestral, Local, Mainstream, Unsigned, Up-and-coming, Free-form, Popular, Ambient, Ethereal, Eclectic, Inspirational, New age, New wave, Surf, Oldies, Goodies, Golden oldies, Classics, New, Billboard, Top 40, Music from the 50’s, 60’s, 70’s, 80’s, 90’s, Hits of yesterday-today and tomorrow, Solo, A cappella, Independent, and of course… Alternative!

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(A) Clean Water.

(B) Bottled water, Filtered water, Spring water, Distilled water, Boiled water, Artesian water, Imported water, Drinking water, Treated water, Fluoridated water, City water, Desalinated water, Carbonated water, Ozonated water, Oxygenated water, Sterilized water, Grey water, Black water, Sewer water, Irrigation water, Chlorinated water, Ion exchanged, Reverse osmosis, Ultraviolet treated, Charcoal filtered, Fiber filtered, Micro-filtered, Nano-filtered, Ultra-filtered, Membrane filtered, Soda water, Soda, Diet soda, Diet drinks, Protein shakes, Smoothies, Coffee, Tea, Juice, Gatorade, Beer, Alcohol, Health drinks, Caffeinated beverages, Pick-me-up, Shots, Stimulants, Hair of the dog, Tonic, Thirst quencher, Juice (10% juice), Concentrated, Regurgitated, Reconstituted, Mixed with, Combined with, Refined, Cultured, Cultivated, Assorted, Acid washed, Bleached, Blended, Fused, Merged, Brought together, Fresh, All-Natural, Wholesome, Fortified, Preserved, Processed, Liquefied, Savory, Zesty, Tangy, Tart, Sharp, Biting, Jolting, Flavorful, Flavor enhanced –with- High Fructose Corn Syrup, Regular Corn Syrup, Sugar, Dextrose, Sucralose, Saccharin, Aspartame, and other poisons and Excito-toxins… It really hits the spot and is quite refreshing.

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(A) Whole, Fresh, Raw, Nutritious, and Healthy.

(B) Powdered, Bleached, Instant, Synthetic, Imitation, Artificial, Packaged, Pre-packaged, Preserved, Pre-cooked, Microwavable, Frozen, Processed, Nutritionally fortified, Hot-house, Refined, Manufactured, Pasteurized, Fried, Reconstituted, Diet, All natural, Genetically modified, Reduced, Sugar free, Fat free, Non-fat, Low fat, Low sodium, Light, Small, Super-sized, Large, Extra-Large, Big Gulp, Buffet, Nutrition Bar, Power Bar, Powdered Protein Shake, and Vitamin and Mineral Supplements.

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(A) Fruit and Vegetable group.

(B) Potato chips, French fries, Onion rings, Blooming onion, Fried zucchini sticks, Jalapeño poppers, Vegetable chips, Lettuce wraps, V8 (high sodium), Ketchup, Condiments, Campbell’s Soup, Fruit bars, Fruit Roll-ups, Fruit flavored, Pop tarts, Juice (10% juice plus high fructose corn syrup), Pills (vitamin and mineral supplements), Canned, Frozen Waxed, Irradiated, Hot-house, Pastes, Concentrates, Homogenized, Pasteurized, Genetically modified, Round-Up Ready, and Non-organic.

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(A) Meat group.

(B) Spam, Hot dogs, Cold cuts, Lunchmeats, Lunchables, Fillers, Soy Burgers, Veggie burgers, Vegetable Protein, Seitan, Slim Jim, Fast food, McDonalds sausage, Taco Bell’s ground beef-like substance, Domino’s slightly meaty pizza toppings, Parts from 100 cows, Deviled meat, Chip beef, Frozen, Microwavable, Easy, Lean, and by the way… why is a beef burger called a “ham” burger?

END
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Perspective… It’s a nice thing to have.

And from my perspective, we are one messed up society!

Now… go back to your blissful ignorance and forget I ever brought any of this up.

That’s the American way, right?

Peace and love to all…    (two things I hope we can still relate to; the human version, not the hollywood one.)

Oh, and if you answered (A) for 911 truth… well all right, that’s a start.

.

Clint Richardson (realitybloger.wordpress.com)

October 8, 2009